Constrained Writing Exercise #5

OK, it was the first one I mentioned.  So let's do it!  Write a short piece without using the letter E even once.  My writing group that meets at the Stephen Crane House in Asbury Park is doing it this month, and next meeting I'll be bringing my piece that I wrote.  This is kind of a monologue, so let me give you the scene set-up.  A  man in a cubicle in an office, phone rings, he answers it, and this is his side of the conversation.


Exercise in Constrained Writing: Short Piece without the Letter E:
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“This is Barack Obama, what can I do for you?

Kidding, what’s up?

Oh, totally, I can’t wait!  So, who’s joining us for Happy Hour?  You and I, obviously, and Stan from down in accounting, and that guy who sits across from him.  But I don’t want… you know… that woman joining us… I can’t say who, but I know you know whom I’m talking about…

Ugh, you know, that annoying chick with that horrid lisp, who’s always complaining about this and that.  I’m sorry, but I just don’t want to ruin a good martini with whining and complaining and talking about work, work, work.

Oh, but what about that guy downstairs… that hot guy with his floppy blond hair.  Ask him to join us.  What’s his story anyway?  Straight?  Gay?  Bi?

Nobody knows?!?  Man, you gotta find out!  His ass is amazing!  God, I would bang him into tomorrow.  Oh, shit, sorry gotta go.  Boss man is calling.  Okay so ask that guy to join us and first round’s on…

What?  No, don’t say I said that!  Sicko!  Oh, but I’m gonna find out all I can tonight.  Okay, two hours to go, you driving or shall I?  Okay, sounds good.  TTFN… huh?  I said, TTFN.  Ta Ta For Now…  OK, I’m out… gotta go"